tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1830949294679547966.post378299152406779974..comments2023-05-17T08:14:10.789-07:00Comments on Men, Women, and Society: "So what's the strategy here? Pretend you're not a nerd?"Aaron Sleazyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06704230661761052919noreply@blogger.comBlogger82125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1830949294679547966.post-69431973669864639512016-02-08T16:21:21.761-08:002016-02-08T16:21:21.761-08:00there is another point to alek except for the dist...there is another point to alek except for the distribution of many instead of one. is that after a certain level there is no point in flowing effort in it to get higher.<br /><br />got top 10 percent then your concern is to maintain it not get to the smaller top group after. that is easier it will be just<br />repeat the resulted routine you have when top 10 percent.<br />if you stop maintaining any of them you decline.<br />but you will keep large part of it. LazyLifehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17166776768659209547noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1830949294679547966.post-9662439661189448822016-02-08T13:45:17.413-08:002016-02-08T13:45:17.413-08:00also those question types of test, are dubious i g...also those question types of test, are dubious i guess? wouldn't trust or give a shit what some paper and conclusion of it on me, based of me filling American questions?<br />its irrelevant if some one define you as such.LazyLifehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17166776768659209547noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1830949294679547966.post-47210004801023859682016-02-08T13:15:55.718-08:002016-02-08T13:15:55.718-08:00i think confidence is a contextual thing, confiden...i think confidence is a contextual thing, confidence in what?<br />your confidence is based on past experience.<br /><br />if you fuck whokers, you will be confident in fucking whokers, you can do it, and whokers are women so there are transfer.<br />of course if you fuck one bitch, then i will be confident fucking only her, but if you fuck different whokers, the hottest ones, and different places and maybe some audience, and more then one at a time(u need money for this), you will be pretty confident and comfortable around girls, like male porn stars. you see, you can fake it. choose a path that gareentees results. but if you look like shit this confidence will be fake and will be broken apart vs girls who judge u only by looks, but if you are rich and they know it, then all good.LazyLifehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17166776768659209547noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1830949294679547966.post-50166415321901894382016-01-29T09:57:18.322-08:002016-01-29T09:57:18.322-08:00Nice vid, but jokes aside, the millenial culture t...Nice vid, but jokes aside, the millenial culture turns every label into a buzzword. Yesterday was being "hipster", today is being a "nerd". Are the younger generations too shallow?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1830949294679547966.post-54065002956038331802016-01-28T17:53:43.775-08:002016-01-28T17:53:43.775-08:00Thanks for the response. Makes sense.Thanks for the response. Makes sense.AnonymousForNowhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10004737344321077576noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1830949294679547966.post-26971228356372557862016-01-27T17:54:52.993-08:002016-01-27T17:54:52.993-08:00Relevant to the "nerd" label that is so ...Relevant to the "nerd" label that is so fashionable these days:<br /><br />https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XJyMT4ZVQEcAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1830949294679547966.post-12197926504080266922016-01-27T14:52:29.987-08:002016-01-27T14:52:29.987-08:00So... It's better to be that slightly physical...So... It's better to be that slightly physicaly fit amateur musician, who also has a knack for photography and cinema, loves practicing TKD, and also has a large social circle; than expending lots of hours in just one of those hobbies?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1830949294679547966.post-5987778671061100252016-01-27T05:21:42.158-08:002016-01-27T05:21:42.158-08:00Hell, there is even a book out talking about livin...Hell, there is even a book out talking about living you life like a game. Neat idea, I must admit. The book is called Level up your life and the writer founded "nerdfitness". Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1830949294679547966.post-29445769024879778992016-01-27T05:19:33.206-08:002016-01-27T05:19:33.206-08:00^^Agree with the above comment. Also, with Android...^^Agree with the above comment. Also, with Android/Apple mobile app games like Candy Crush, etc., games are acceptable. It's funny that those mobile game users would call themselves gamers though...Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1830949294679547966.post-18256292491560166342016-01-27T04:14:55.745-08:002016-01-27T04:14:55.745-08:00This sounds like really powerful strategy for life...This sounds like really powerful strategy for life. <br /><br />It seems that in any field/discipline there is a rule of diminishing return - the more effort you invest the lower payoff per unit of effort you get.<br /><br />So what Alek seems to be suggesting is to find different fields/disciplines which are functionally related(means they all help you attract women for example) and then distribute your effort evenly across those fields.<br />This seems like a really smart way to maximize rate of return on effort.<br /><br />Trick is finding those fields which are functionally related and synergize with each other. As for getting women we already have the formula - body, social niche and money. Trick is to apply same reasoning to career, social life or any other aspect of your life which you want to improve.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1830949294679547966.post-33142323869164895652016-01-26T19:55:04.674-08:002016-01-26T19:55:04.674-08:00I've never heard of this minmaxing stuff. But ...I've never heard of this minmaxing stuff. But it sounds like the ideal term to adopt from now on. It's very elegant. <br /><br />Also, the element of a "gamble" that Aaron focuses on is key. I think my metaphor above is faulty... I said something like this:<br /><br /><i>- It takes 100 points of effort to become the lowest ranked officer<br />- It takes 2000 points of effort to become the highest ranked officer<br />(but you get no additional benefits)<br />- It takes 5000 points of effort to become a "king"</i><br /><br />But this isn't a valid metaphor, because it implies the "top guy" <b>(or top business in an industry, or top band in a music genre)</b> won the top spot fairly, just by putting in "250% more effort"... <br /><br />But its not true in the real world - the real world doesn't reward effort fairly or linearly. If there are 3 "top status guys" (or bands, or businesses) in an industry or a niche or whatever... there are 250 guys who worked JUST AS HARD (or even harder) than the guys at top, but didn't get the benefit. Due to things such as connections, inborn talent, invisible (and hard to quantify) side-skills that help indirectly, and PURE LUCK.<br /><br />Blame hollywood and the media. The 250 don't make for a good story. And minmaxing truly is a gamble. Its not like "oh, i just didn't make the top" - you would have wasted 10-15-20 years of single-minded focus...<br /><br />This means you let every other area suffer. And then you wake up 20 years later and you're like "I screwed up". Those are 20 years I could have spent investing in 10 other things at the same time.Alek Novyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00727239708216696902noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1830949294679547966.post-56983105134482347672016-01-26T13:07:50.747-08:002016-01-26T13:07:50.747-08:00Min-maxing in life is quite a gamble. In most sett...Min-maxing in life is quite a gamble. In most settings, and strictly referring to 'regular people' who don't have an unfair competitive advantage (think height for NBA players, or a wealthy and well-connected family for a career in business), you will be much better off being an all-rounder than a specialist. Of course, if you are highly successful in your niche, you might question this advice, but this would be an instance of survivorship bias, because we never hear from those who min-maxed, focusing on one skill, where the gamble did not pay off. This applies to the job as well as to your private life. In fact, there is arguably no skill where you will be able to join the upper echelons without sacrificing a large part of your life for it.Aaron Sleazyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06704230661761052919noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1830949294679547966.post-61050425097485707882016-01-26T12:48:44.456-08:002016-01-26T12:48:44.456-08:00In a few words, in RPG language: having a skilled ...In a few words, in RPG language: having a skilled character with good all around stats is better than just minmaxing.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1830949294679547966.post-26634410730565382662016-01-26T11:23:43.187-08:002016-01-26T11:23:43.187-08:00Put another way. It's better to be a top 10% d...<i>Put another way. It's better to be a top 10% dude in several things... then to waste years trying to become a 0.1% guy in one thing.</i><br /><br />I meant "*than to" (obviously)...<br /><br />...But also, on another note... primarily its not multiple niches, but multiple traits. **<br /><br /><b>Compare these two situations:</b><br /><br /><b> Situation A</b><br />- top 10% status (through technical ability) in the niche<br />- top 10% physique<br />- top 10% social skills, ability to work a room<br />- top 10% ability to escalate, make moves, read signals, and send signals (i.e. flirting ability)<br /><br /><b> Situation B</b><br /><br />- Being top 5% in a niche<br />- Average physique<br />- Average social skills<br />- Average "flirting ability"<br /><br /><b>Which is better?</b><br /><br />Obviously situation A will get you much better results. Here's the crazy thing though. Situation B takes a lot more effort and energy, despite giving worse results.<br /><br />When somebody is a 5%er is because they were trying for the top (0.01%) It's easy to get screwed over by trying to become a 0.01% er in something, and comes from being too tunnel-visioney in your strategy. <br /><br /><i>"I'm going to become the number one most looked up to photographer in my city, and all the hobby photographer chicks will look up to me, love me and hit on me, so it won't matter that I have horrible fashion sense, a beer belly, can't approach them at the gatherings and seminars, and I can't make a move when they do finally show interest... because I'll become number one, and they'll do all the work"...</i><br /><br />That fantasy IS somewhat true - if you are number one, they will seek you out and do a lot of the work, and you won't need much of the other stuff...<br /><br />However, it takes a ton of work to become number 1 in something. It's much easier to become a top 10%er in all of the foundations COMBINED, than to become number one in a single thing.<br /><br />Alek Novyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00727239708216696902noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1830949294679547966.post-58327274493883765392016-01-26T07:16:24.441-08:002016-01-26T07:16:24.441-08:00So have you noticed this same general trend in oth...<i>So have you noticed this same general trend in other niches?</i><br /><br />We've also discussed this phenomenon from another perspective in the comments here. <b>This phenomenon is why its better to focus on multiple things at once.</b><br /><br />Let's make this all nerdy, and use numbers and nerdy titles... to make for a clearer overview. Let's use a terminology like this. <br /><br />- Let's say that the top guy in a niche is a "king"... there are about 2-3 kings per niche ("masters" or "grandmasters" alternatively)<br /><br />- Let's say that there are also "officers" in the niche. These are guys who are established as having "peer" status in the niche as you say... now there might be 30-40 officers in a niche of a thousand people. These are people who are "intermediate" or "experts"... but not "masters"<br /><br />- At the same time, there are about 500 low-ranking guys. This seems to be true in every niche... there are always more newbies and casually uninterested people who don't have ambition to go above "experienced beginner" or "casual participant".<br /><br />Now, as you say... once you get to "expert" or "officer" rank... there isn't much additional benefit. You get the same benefits (in terms of attracting female attention) whether you're the lowest ranked or the highest ranked "officer".<br /><br />Now here's the irony... (arbitrary numbers to make a point)<br /><br />- It takes 100 points of effort to become the lowest ranked officer<br />- It takes 2000 points of effort to become the highest ranked officer<br />(but you get no additional benefits)<br />- It takes 5000 points of effort to become a "king"<br /><br />The logical conclusion from this, in terms of ROI is - unless you plan on becoming a "king" - its better to become a low-ranking officer in multiple niches, then waste time on a single niche. Its better to be established as a peer in multiple things, than waste years only to get to "higher lever officer" and gain no additional benefits.<br /><br />This also applies in multiple foundations. Once you get to a top 10% physique, you've gotten most of the benefits. Getting to a top 7% physique is 10 times as hard, but offers no additional benefits. You only get additional benefits once you get to be a professional fitness model, which involves a ton more effort and stress.<br /><br />(again arbitrary numbers)<br /><br />Put another way. It's better to be a top 10% dude in several things... then to waste years trying to become a 0.1% guy in one thing.Alek Novyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00727239708216696902noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1830949294679547966.post-1503894457573732722016-01-26T07:07:36.632-08:002016-01-26T07:07:36.632-08:00… of course that's true as well! ;)… of course that's true as well! ;)Lucretius Carushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11401874110101292496noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1830949294679547966.post-4145097788170199722016-01-24T16:31:20.780-08:002016-01-24T16:31:20.780-08:00'Tempus fugit' might be the more appropria...'Tempus fugit' might be the more appropriate phrase. ;)Aaron Sleazyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06704230661761052919noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1830949294679547966.post-42258905554079151872016-01-19T05:30:57.815-08:002016-01-19T05:30:57.815-08:00Spot on! TIME is everything.
TEMPVS VINCIT OMNIA....Spot on! TIME is everything.<br /><br />TEMPVS VINCIT OMNIA.Lucretius Carushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11401874110101292496noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1830949294679547966.post-91818313858377670452016-01-18T20:53:37.144-08:002016-01-18T20:53:37.144-08:00I want to clarify that it took me 2-3 sessions to ...I want to clarify that it took me 2-3 sessions to get comfortable going to that first gym only. It took about a month (~12 sessions) to feel like I really had a handle on things. At that point I could feel comfortable going to most gyms. Even now, at blue belt, I would feel not perfectly comfortable going to a top competition gym, even though I've competed at 5 separate tournaments. So to all guys getting into BJJ specifically, you're going to feel a bit out of place for a while, but it lessens every time. I hope you like getting strangled in the meantime.<br /><br />However, as far as getting laid goes, breaking through that initial high level of discomfort was all that mattered. Sure, if you can get to a super high level in BJJ (way more true for MMA), then you can bang a lot of girls through status/different opportunities, but for the most part you just meet them at the gym while training. If you're desperate not to have your first impression suck (yes, it is important), then get some private sessions. Since there is quite a bit of turnover in gyms, it doesn't matter as much as you think, so don't let it stop you from going if you're interested.<br /><br />Specifically to Alec,<br /><br />I touched on this above, but I've noticed that, within the MMA and BJJ communities respectively, having the status of Peer is critical. In other words, belonging is very important to getting laid with the girls in that group. However, once you get that, almost all that matters is looks, height, etcetera. It definitely helps to be an instructor, and the higher the belt the better, but it doesn't really matter as much as looks.<br /><br />That is, until you get quite a bit of status, and then it matters an enourmous amount. Some guy who fights in the UFC (even if just average) comes in to the gym and it's a big deal, and is more important than good looks for female attention. Same for a top competition guy in BJJ. <br /><br />To clarify, in MMA, if we assume that a UFC champion has 100% status, then a good semi-pro fighter only has around 1% status. The UFC champion has so much more benefit from status that I think it distorts regular guys impressions of how important status really is. Even within a gym, being a black belt is barely a benefit over being a blue belt, you have to actually go "all the way" to making status very important. <br /><br />So have you noticed this same general trend in other niches? AnonymousForNowhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10004737344321077576noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1830949294679547966.post-4201429431933730602016-01-17T23:51:42.833-08:002016-01-17T23:51:42.833-08:00Your BJJ example is pretty perfect, because that&#...Your BJJ example is pretty perfect, because that's how it works everywhere. You do it for x time feeling anxious and out of place, once you pass a threshold you can go into any similar venue in the world and feel "at home".<br /><br />Now in other hobbies it might not take "just 3 hours to acclimate". Because in those others you feel more out of place, more anxious and they might be more socially stressful (cool popular guys, hotter women etc)... That's where the private training comes in. It helps you handle the competency part, easing the process.Alek Novyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00727239708216696902noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1830949294679547966.post-60231742573250604992016-01-17T21:10:14.332-08:002016-01-17T21:10:14.332-08:00"For me, relationship sex is something I'..."For me, relationship sex is something I'd do even if people thought less of me for it. I can't say my one and only girlfriend felt differently."<br /><br />Because you're a man, and as such, sex for you is more important than social status. Ironically, for that very same reason, society will not shame or look down on you for having sex.<br /><br />"Feminists have borderline stated that men are only attracted to hot, young, thin girls because they want their trophy wife to impress other men."<br /><br />It's called projection. Feminists are masters of it.Faulknernoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1830949294679547966.post-92022209811145745782016-01-17T20:31:11.500-08:002016-01-17T20:31:11.500-08:00It's so obvious but I will leave a note here:
...It's so obvious but I will leave a note here:<br /><br />Whatever people might say, most don't understand the value of time. Time is just so precious that most smart "nerdy" should understand it. Investing times in social hobbies or academic pursues, or career improvements are great. This will even be much better for you since you already have that strong obssession with you.<br /><br />Spending years after years playing video games, surfing webs after webs (and imparing your concentrating ability in long term) is not the way to live your life.<br /><br />It's not a matter of changing your "nerdy" features yet, it's a matter of knowing what to invest times on, that's crucial.<br /><br />If you feel you are a useless nerdy piece of shit, you have a lot to figure out and work on.Isidiahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10972510470487971845noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1830949294679547966.post-66711369744234288672016-01-17T14:08:44.847-08:002016-01-17T14:08:44.847-08:00The Big Bang Theory, the Nolan Batman Saga and the...The Big Bang Theory, the Nolan Batman Saga and the MCU films have turned the geek culture from a cultural ghetto into a comercial juggernaut. I find this quite amusing, as if you were open about your geeky personality a couple of years ago, you'd be shunned by society, or at least by a huge chunk of it. Being a nerd/geek meant being a social pariah.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1830949294679547966.post-31283201591452555392016-01-17T00:01:26.737-08:002016-01-17T00:01:26.737-08:00For the record, I'm not saying that you have h...For the record, I'm not saying that you have had some bizarre experiences with women. Quite the opposite. I just don't agree with your conclusion.<br /><br />I personally have bragged about fucking a hot girl - who never actually made me cum (I didn't tell anybody about the last part). The sex was terrible, but since she was really hot it was seen as a precious wonderful thing that must have happened to me because I am so awesome/lucky. That doesn't mean that I enjoy attention-whoring more than actual sex, not even close.<br /><br />Actually I may be talking past you here. Are you saying that even your girlfriends enjoyed bragging about you more than the sex? I fully agree that many one night stands are awful, and pursued for ego reasons. For me, relationship sex is something I'd do even if people thought less of me for it. I can't say my one and only girlfriend felt differently.AnonymousForNowhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10004737344321077576noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1830949294679547966.post-37053388841223398032016-01-16T23:45:02.987-08:002016-01-16T23:45:02.987-08:00Two things.
1) Regardless of the true importance ...Two things.<br /><br />1) Regardless of the true importance of status, concluding that "status is all that women care about", as Faulkner did, is ridiculous after you've just paid for sex. Why not conclude that money is all that women care about? Probably because that would be instantly recognized as a product of a skewed sample. <br /><br />2) Status does actually matter quite a bit. It also matters to men. Just because women love to show off their "catches", doesn't mean they don't actually enjoy fucking them. Feminists have borderline stated that men are only attracted to hot, young, thin girls because they want their trophy wife to impress other men. Could it possibly be that men get some enjoyment both out of being seen together with hot girls and also fucking them? Of course.AnonymousForNowhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10004737344321077576noreply@blogger.com