Found on Roosh’s forum: Guy does 3000 approaches in 10 years, has zero success, and wonders why “game” doesn’t work

I was recently made aware of a rather intriguing post on Roosh’s forum that perfectly illustrates everything that’s wrong with “gamers”: Why Hasn't Game Worked? 

In short, some dude writes down his life story in a few thousands words, and the gist of it is that despite swallowing the “red pill”, and diligently approaching women with his amazing game, he never got laid. You can probably sense were this is going: he’s obviously wondering why his “technique” doesn’t work.

That guy is a poster boy of the frustrated manosphere. Instead of fantasising about banging foreign chicks, like so many of them do, he actually temporarily moved to a third-world country. There, he found out that he needed money to get laid as well. In fact, he mentions that he had sex there times: twice with hookers, and one time with a girl he met online. Apparently, there was some monetary exchange involved as well, since he writes, “But it didn't feel right. I wasn't sure how to tell if it was real, or if they were only trying to scam me or gold-dig.”

He summarises his situation as follows:

I approached like a machine. I did over 1000 approaches in the span of a year, in college, in the prime of my youth, when I had all my hair, a decent wardrobe, and a universally recognized "bright future" ahead of me. Now I'm bald (probably from all the stress and lack of physical touch from women), and have no societal "place". I've done a grand total of 3000 approaches (maybe more) throughout my career, and the only thing I've gotten from it is 3000 pieces of evidence that no matter how hard I work, and how many risks I take, I'm still not going to succeed. I almost wish I had never approached, and never learned game, because at least that way I'd still have hope that I could succeed if only I were to try. 

3000 approaches and not a single girlfriend. Not a single lay. Barely even a kiss. It's like I'm just INVISIBLE. What the fuck is going on? Please, somebody, help me.

There is one key element that isn't quite specified. He mentions that he's short, but doesn't quantify it for quite a while.

The Roosh forum crowd at first calls him a troll. As I remarked in my last article, people with very little success tend to build an ego around the little success they have. This leads them to inflate their own success, and to become hostile towards everybody who questions the religion of “game”.

Eventually, advice comes:

See a girl, talk to a girl, touch a girl.
Works everywhere in the world, regardless of language or culture.
This is how babies get made!
Somewhere between Talk and Touch, you haven't provided ANY information about
- what you're saying and doing
- how she's reacting
You already know your own problem
"But I was afraid to escalate"

What’s missing? Well, the entire preparation. No girl will let you touch her if you don’t look good enough for her, whatever her personal standard may be. Besides, we're still left in the dark with regards to some basic factors.

Some advice wasn’t entirely misguided, though:

The best advice I can give you is to start making money. I used to put in countless hours approaching and never got laid, but when I started making money things changed. honestly it's a better use of your time to make money instead of approaching. Making money is the best way to get laid. Fact.

Otherwise, it’s the usual. He gets told he has to work on his personality, study comedy, “see the value” in himself, learn to “frame” things the right way and all that other nonsense. Some guy who seemingly hasn’t gotten laid in a decade either advises him to befriend girls:

4. Give them your number for SOCIAL REASONS, in this case yoga n smoothie/food with friends. (Have them text you their name)
5a. Do this with 10-15 chicks

This of course leads to the problem that it’s next to impossible to move out of the friend zone, because girls who want to have sex with you are not going to be friends with you first to begin with, but instead are eager to spread her legs. If you are indecisive, they will simply lose interest.


Roosh himself chimed in:

For a small percentage of men, no amount of "game" or approaches can work, but then again we have no idea what type of game you're using. You would have to hire an expert to diagnose the problem.

Fantastic advice! Or not. The problem, though, is that “game” is useless if your foundations aren’t in order. If they are, then “game” is irrelevant but, and that’s the kicker, “game” is also irrelevant if your foundations need to be improved.

Some other guy had something more helpful to say:

OP- your experience is not unique! I've known several guys with a similar story. I don't think you are a troll or a female.
While reading your story I already knew what the problem is - you don't escalate! 

Again, this ignored the elephant in the room: how does that dude look like, and how tall or short is he?

Eventually he reveals that he is only 5’2”. He's also balding, so that’s two big disadvantages right there. On the plus side, someone on that forum claims that he had skyped with that dude, and that he was above-average looking. Later on, he posted pictures of himself. He’s not bad looking, but could lose a bit of weight. It seems that it’s primarily his height that’s holding him back.

I’d say his best chance would be to get inlays for his shoes, fix his outfit, shave his head, and look for women who are at most as tall as himself. This wouldn’t leave him with a lot of options, but it would still be better than approaching 3,000 women at random.

However, he followed the “red pill” path, and moved to China. That part of the forum discussion is amusing to read as well. Some claim it was easy to get laid there as a Westerner, but others paid attention in school and remembered that China has a one-child policy and that girls are often aborted, which should lead to a rather poor male/female ratio.

But, don’t despair:

China has a terrible m/f ratio, but only if you are a poor Chinese guy with no Game. 

It seems it’s impossible to argue with those who believe in the religion of “game”.

He does fare better in China, though, at least on the "red herrings" metric:

American girls are the rudest, meanest rejectors. Chinese girls continue to be kind, and treat me well - but I can tell they have zero interest in anything romantic or physical. As far as dating goes, I'm no more on their radar than I am on an American girl's radar. 

Fuck this. This ain't what I signed up for. 

I am gathering up the courage to tell my very nice and kind coworkers and boss that I'm leaving. Everything here was perfect, except for not having feminine affection.

Well, it's certainly not as if they did tell him that blow jobs or a "girlfriend experience" was part of his compensation, so his sense of entitlement strikes me as misplaced. At that point in the thread I did have the impression that his "inner game" could need some work, i.e. a psychologist might be what he needs more than getting his dick wet. Look at this:

Fuck the whole world.  

The only point in living is to love and be loved. If you don't have that, you might as well take the beautiful gift of life and return it to the store. It's worthless. 

My main - no, ONLY - purpose in life now is to find someone to love. There is nothing else. All of my hobbies and interests are worthless. I don't give a shit about any of it. Everything I used to care about, everything I used to be passionate about, is dead to me. 

Sadly this is a trap many men and women fall into. No, your romantic partners are not there to give your life meaning. If you're a miserable piece of shit without having someone to fuck, you're most likely remain a miserable piece of shit even if you manage to get a girlfriend.

That thread thus took a rather bad turn. At the end, a user named Melodramati tries to speak some sense, and gets banned quickly:

I am not saying that there is NO such thing as game. I am saying that game can't really compensate for looks, status or money and game might be something different than what the typical PUA says it is.

The response he got was straight from the unwritten textbook of manosphere idiocy:

No - what you say is exactly what Game-denialism is. 

Response from SaneGuy:

Of course you can still get laid if you're ugly. It'll just be harder, the women will be of lower qualities and the women who are into you will be fewer. You are talking about "game" like it some sacred magical force or science. Game is neither, game is VERY simply put; not fucking up when girls are already attracted to you and being good at escalation. I am not a "PUAhater" and even if I was, why would the idea that it is "mainstream" make any difference? 

You are speaking in very hypothetical situations and your arguments are not grounded in reality but in presumptions. Furthermore, does any of these oh so great PUAs of yours actually have any proof of all the "HB9's" that they pull? No. Its easy to exaggerate. You blind trust in authorities and discourse is sickening.

At this point the thread comes full circle. That sane poster got banned. Ironically, the very same beliefs he pointed out where what got the thread starter into this whole mess of approaching women randomly for 10 years, without taking his shortcomings into account.