Let's start with this:
In elementary, I was teased about my weight. But, I was able to lose twenty pounds after high school. So, now, I'm 5'4" and 150 lbs. What sucks though, is that I still carry weight in my face and have an ugly double chin. I absolutely hate taking pictures because of that.
However, I feel that I've compensated for my looks with my intelligence and kindness. I know that I have an awesome personality. So, for the past couple of years, I've been content with myself.
I had to laugh as well. No, you can't compensate obesity with "kindness" and "intelligence". She's applying for secretarial work, so it's doubtful that she is particularly smart to begin with, not just because the nature of the work does not require the IQ of a rocket scientist, but also because it's obvious to anybody but the thickets SJW or feminist that for some positions your looks are of paramount importance. Secretaries tend to be above average in looks, just as your average waitress is hotter than your average woman. No, she really can't be that bright.
Later that week, we are talking with his friend, who I had just met, and, jokingly, my BF mentions me applying for the job and says that I didn't get it because "I wasn't hot enough." It hurt so bad hearing him say that. I cried later that night and we talked about it. He apologized and said it was him just playing around. On top of this, I go by his work and see the new girl and she's beautiful and looks Asian.
Many a true word is spoken in jest, as the saying goes. Yet, he has a point. You could say that he is a bit of a dick for stating the obvious, but on the other hand, how would you communicate to a woman that maybe she can't quite compensate for her looks with her "intelligence and kindness" after all? No matter what he would say, it would come out the wrong way. Any of you who has ever been in a relationship with a woman who, magically, turned from being a bombshell into slightly overweight and wanted to discuss that issue can probably confirm that one needs great diplomatic skill in such a situation, considering how full of themselves many women are.
What is really startling, though, is that the top-rated reply, seemingly by a woman, misses the point by a country mile:
I agree with /u/fredlet that your boyfriend seems to want you to think that ONLY HE could find you attractive. That kind of playing on your vulnerabilities is a way that he could isolate you from everyone else and make you feel more dependent upon him. Don't fall for it. Build up your confidence any way you can, for yourself, and rethink this relationship.
Complete fucking bullshit. Her boyfriend is not targeting her insecurities at all, but instead wants to open her eyes to the truth, namely that for the kind of position she is applying for, she might need to work on her looks. Thankfully she's not auditioning in Hollywood, so slim legs and high heels should go a long way in making her gainfully employed.
In fact, it is painful to read such drivel, particularly since the poster realized that, maybe, she really needs to work on herself. She writes, "For what it's worth, I started working out this week because I'm tired of feeling this way." That's the spirit! If you're unhappy with your looks, because you look like crap, you shouldn't complain how the world works, but start exercising. Yet, with this outpour of sympathy on Reddit, it would not surprise me at all if she concluded that her boyfriend does not "deserve" her, and that beauty comes in any size. Well, there's always ice cream to comfort her, and the company of cats.
What do you think? Let me know in the comments below!
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