Tuesday, March 1, 2016

The Open Thread: March 2016

Since I get a relatively high number of comments that are tangential to the articles, I'd like to try to move those parts of the conversation to the monthly 'Open Thread'.
In short, if you think anything you're going to write is "off topic" to the current post, but still related to pickup, women, gender politics and other topics I discuss on this blog, then please leave a comment to the most recent Open Thread, such like this one. Just post below.

Thank you.

73 comments:

  1. Good article/summary about the situation in Sweden/Scandinavia. Use Google translate or others.

    http://www.dagbladet.no/spesial/syria/sak/sverige/

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  2. In RSD Julien's newest youtube video, he talks about how the media scandal in 2014 has lost him all his money, which was almost half a million dollar (!). Can anyone venture a reason for Julien being personally liable for this amount of money? He probably had some clause in his employment contract for being held liable for cancelled bootcamps and such by virtue of the instructor's fault, but is RSD (I understand they once made it to Inc Magazine’s “Inc 5000” List, http://www.inc.com/profile/real-social-dynamics) really paying their instructors that well?

    Here's the link to the video: https://youtu.be/lmQ_ukE-zME

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    1. This sounds like bullshit to me. Just do some back of the envelope calculations for a rough estimate of how much you would have to earn (on a job!) to accumulate half a million dollars in a few years. Maybe he is mixing up fiction and reality, and is referring to exaggerated potential income, which he lost due to negative publicity.

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    2. No one of this joke crew has half a million USD.
      It's such an unprofitable business. All they show you are their packed free tour shows.
      How much is a boot camp? USD 3000? Something like that I guess. How many students do they get? per camp? Seven, eight?
      Didn't they have this instructor-to-student-ratio like one to three? So 9000 per instructor per boot camp to pay the flight all around the world, the hotels, the free tour hotel seminar reservations, the website administration costs.
      This "company" does not even have a solid product. What do they do? Talk about the same stuff over and over, re-package four or five concepts into blogs and vlogs. I mean come on, that's childish stuff.
      Also, if he lost half a million, he certainly had more money. How much net worht is he supposed to have 1 million? 1.5? 2? No way. These guys are broke.
      There was a video of Tyler Durden with his kids plaing in their apartment some years ago. Plain and simple apartment you could rent in a mjor European city for like EUR 2000 per month maximum. Millionaires don't live in these kind of places.
      I believe they make like 30-60k per year. That's it. It's all fake.

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  3. I find it unlikely Julien was sitting on a half a million. He may very well have not had as many bootcamps to teach and suffered a loss of potential income. Unfortunately, fame may last 15 minutes but infamy lasts a bit longer.

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  4. I find it strange that one of your main teachings, Aaron, is that there is not really such a thing as 'game' and that all you gotta do is 'not fuck it up.' However, having read your sleazy stories this doesn't quite resonate with its content. In the book's seductions you seem to make quite a few smart and calculated moves. Moves that, had you not done them, would have likely messed up the interaction and produced a negative result (read: going home empty handed). To me, this is evidence that there's a skill element involved. Although i'm very impressed by the stories, i encountered multiple situations in your book where girls throw obstacles at you, act distant, or have their 'slut defense' on. How can you deal with that kind of shit if there's no 'game' involved? I'm also curious what your definition of 'game' would be, as i see this term countless times used in different contexts, and it's became such a vague and general term that it's giving me headaches. Cheers

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    1. I read some parts of Sleazy Stories and I have not finished reading the book but I also had similar thoughts I mean there is one instance where Aaron saids that he comes prepared with stories to tell. Even though I doubt that Aaron seriously thinks that telling stories will create attraction from scratch or demonstrate some sort of value or characteristics like I think PUAs used them for I was kinda surprised myself.

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    2. Peter,

      Sleazy Stories is not a manual to seduction, and can hardly be one, since it is too closely tied to a particular scene and location (and I clearly specify where those events took place). On the other hand, Minimal Game is much more general and widely applicable. Sure, you can try what you read in Sleazy Stories elsewhere, but chances are that you'll make things more difficult for yourself. It's quite like wanting to run Paul Janka-style day game outside of Manhattan. Doable, but won't work as well, simply because success with women is also dependent on the environment. Your clubs don't foster an environment of debauchery and you don't look like one of the top guys, compared to the average, in your scene? Then Sleazy Stories won't happen for you. Not a million single women in their mid-20s in a city with a shortage of men? Sorry, day game success won't quite happen for you.

      Game is essentially noticing that she is interested and moving the interaction forward.

      anon,
      you must refer to a side remark where I mention that I thought of anecdotes to tell. This is quite different from the stories, scripts, or routines PUAs tell. The occasional anecdote, when it fits, or a good joke, if you can tell jokes well, is certainly fine. However, telling a contrived ten minute story most probably never is. Note that I lived in London during the heydays of the pickup industry, and I met people who had memorized (!) stories of five, ten, or even fifteen minutes length.

      Delete
  5. Sleazy can answer this well enough, but not fucking it up is largely just a matter of social acuity, and if you want to label that as "game" then sure, game exists. But, this only works in the context that the woman in question is interesting in you and is down to do things.

    "Game" as is supposedly taught by PUA types is that through some sequence of verbal and non verbal behaviour you can make a woman sexually attracted to you. That "Game" is fictional.

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    1. So you are saying that there hasn't been one case where an uninterested woman turned into an interested woman? That would mean that a woman decides within the first seconds if she is interested or not, and that thought remains static and stuck in her head for the rest of the interaction no matter what you do. Perhaps there is a possibility that by saying the right things or acting in the right way, that thought can be changed. Women often make decisions based on emotions, and if you can get her in the right emotional state she might change her mind. True or not, to me this doesn't seem like a super crazy idea. Or is this assumption completely false? I'm not very experienced myself and i'm trying to understand this better.

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    2. Dude, people win the lottery. Yet, if you know about the concept of 'expected value', you won't bother with it. May I suggest you better get some real-life experience before speculating that you, yes you, are the absolute exception for whom basic principles of meeting women do not apply.

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    3. @ Peter Z.: Dude, women choose or don't choose for a wide variety of reasons, based on how they feel, depending on the environment they're in, who they're with etc. etc. I. e. for most parts its a totally erratic procesd. But being sexually attractive & somewhat masculine certainly helps.

      Btw. the mechanisms of female choice within all mammals can occur along the lines of those three basic processes:

      1. "Best of N": which means, that from a given pool of available males she will pick the in her eyes "best" one. This is an ambivalent situation, b/c she can never be entirely sure to have made the "best possible deal" as far as her Darwin fitness is concerned.

      2. "threshold based": The least favourable with women. The can only choose from a pool of males, who best meet her very basic minimum criteria — and they HAVE to make a choice. Women will try to avoid this paradigm at all costs, unless their forced to abide by it by society or rligion.

      3. "hierarchically selective": this is more or less what we're dealing with in the West today. Females basically split the massively increased amount of men they're able to potentially choose from into two groups. Group one is the huuuge group of "invisible men", males whom women consider to be entirely worthless (either as sex partners or as providers), i. e. "losers", "wussies", "nice guys", "nondescript, generic guys" etc. Those men they'd like to entirely avoid and thus they're not even perceiving them as actually being alive beings. For women such men perfectly blend in with the tapestry. The second group of men are those whom they do perceive to be worthwile and viable prospects and from this very subgroup they will try to get the very "best of N" in accordance to their sexual buying power. This process is the most satisfying one for their narcissm and their choosiness. But it will put them under heightened stress and severe intra-female competition. Since most females will want to have monopolized access to the few top males of this subgroup, they will have to actively fight with increased cattieness for those fewer top tier males. This is the main underlying reason why girls nowadays on average even from a young puberty age get to dress & also behave sluttier and sluttier. Since those "top" men have been thrown into a total buyer's market they can roam around much more freely and are not forced to choose & settle. Going out and "shopping for genes", many women will then be content with "owning their genetic shares" in such a man instead of the "entire company". So if they can, in many cases they will fuck with such males, readily get pregnant and if they cannot monopolize such a specimen, then search for a more controllable, non-obtrusive, gullible provider-male, who will help her in raising her offspring by willingly providing his emotional & material resources.

      These are the basic female biological scripts of choice in nature — and with the mammal of homo sapiens.

      Ok, so there you have it and now you know what you're up against. LOL

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    4. So you are saying that there hasn't been one case where an uninterested woman turned into an interested woman?

      Note the difference between "interest" and "attraction". Yes, interest can change. Attraction can't.

      This is what people are confusing. When we say game doesn't exist around these parts we mean you can't go up to a girl tonight, start off in her "would never bang" category, say or do some thing, and then at end of the night be in her "would bang" category.

      You can however be in her "dude is somewhat bangable, but not interested in banging him coz I got a lot of work to do, and gotta get up early, so not worth the hassle" category. And then get her to bang you by the end of the night.

      If you wanna call this "game", then so be it. But most experienced guys wouldn't even bother. Once you get experience you get good at identifying girls who'll make it easy for you. And they're just as attractive as the girls you have to "make bang you".

      Its semantics really. PUAs (the ones most associated with "game") sell the notion that you can "create", "tweak" and "grow" attraction. Which is different than interest.

      If most gurus substituted "attraction" with "interest" in their talks and products, i'd personally not refer to them as scammers anymore. Lame and stupid and ineffective, yes, but no longer scammers.

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    5. Women change their mind, that's true.

      But they change their mind on wheter they will act on their attraction or not.

      Not just women. You too.

      Imagine a girl you are sexually attracted to, but she is a crazy weirdo (borderline personality) whose father is in prison and she stabbed an ex. You have a massive boner ; will you fuck her ? I hope not !!

      Imagine a girl you that gives you a massive boner, you make out with her and she pukes in your mouth. Will you fuck her ? Unless you have strange fetishes, you will instantly lose your interest !

      The other way around now. Imagine a girl that gives you a boner, but she is super needy/clingy, you have already experienced this kind of relationships in the past and you know it will only bring drama in your life. You will decide not to fuck her despite your attraction. But you meet her again 2 years later and she seems to have become self-confident. No more obstacle : you decide to fuck her and maybe even have a relationship with her.

      Imagine a girl that gives you a boner. Somebody calls you : your grandfather is dead. No more in the mood.

      Etc.

      PUA and other weirdos claim that you can create attraction. Which is not true. Game is simply learning how to recognize the clues that DTF women gives you and having the basic social skills to lead her into the bedroom. It's also being able to recognize that women can be attracted to you, but don't want to fuck you for whatever reason. If a woman is comfortable with your touch in intimate zones, then she is attracted to you (99.9% sure). Even if she doesn't accept the makeout, even if she doesnt want to fuck.

      Since most of the times, their reason (for not fucking) is fucking ridiculous, you can just be sorry for them and their shitty life and thank mother nature that you are a man.

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    6. Alek Novy said "Yes, interest can change. Attraction can't."

      I disagree. I remember one woman who worked with me. I was the "nice guy" (in appearance) who would listen to her problems with men. It took 6 months for her to want to have sex with me but from that point on she wanted to fuck every day, several times a day. I know, 6 months is a long time but I wanted to fuck her, that's why I stayed.

      How did I "seduce" her? I was a nice guy a first. Then I began to be little by little less "nice" and to make progressively more indirect reference to sex. Then one day she said, "I want to fuck you" and began to pursue me. This is a true story. So, sometimes attraction can change.

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    7. Presumably, she doesn't have a lot of options (hint: she actively pursued you; hot women hardly ever do that because guys line up to talk to them) and would have fucked you a lot sooner. Or do you honestly think that a woman who is not sexually interested at all will tolerate you making a move? It just doesn't work like that. Just view it from your perspective --- if some ugly chick you've known for months suddenly started touching you, you'd be grossed out. After all, sexual attraction does not grow with familiarity.

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    8. And what allows you to say that it was a change in attraction and not interest ?

      Was she disgusted by you at the beginning and suddenly became comfortable with your touch and sexualization ?

      Maybe during these 6 months she was fucking someone else, so she had no need for another dick. Maybe she is a (religious) weirdo that thinks sex is bad and it took her 6 months to become comfortable with the idea of sex. Maybe you don't know how to recognize signals and after 6 months she was tired of your passiveness so she told you "I want to fuck you". Who knows ?

      And if she indeed was disgusted at the beginning and she suddenly changed her mind, something tells me that it was because her heart was broken by an alpha, so she suddenly became interested in you, mr. beta that has been pursuing her during 6 months because she badly needed someone that was listening to her and giving her attention and affection everyday. She wanted to try "beta sex" even if her gut feeling was telling her it was a bad idea. I also highly doubt that your sexual relationship lasted very long.

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    9. Notice the emphasis of "attraction at start of the night vs attraction at end of the night".

      You CAN change "long-term attraction" over a longer-period.

      Search for previous discussions on "short-term mating" vs "long-term mating". Scientists talk about "short-term attraction" and "long-term attraction". The first is about whom she'd bang for the sake of banging, ie lust, sex for the sake of sex. The second is whom she'd accept as a provider (trading sex for something else, be it resources, affection, commitment, etc).

      You can over time win a woman over who was not initially interested (she had no short-term attraction, but you won her long-term attraction).

      But that's not what PUAs sell. They sell the idea of saying or doing things to change short-term attraction. (meeting her on the street today, and banging her in 2 days, despite the fact she was disgusted when you first said hello on the street)

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    10. Alek Novy: "But that's not what PUAs sell. They sell the idea of saying or doing things to change short-term attraction. (meeting her on the street today, and banging her in 2 days, despite the fact she was disgusted when you first said hello on the street)"

      I agree. PUA shit wouldn't have worked with her. I didn't do any physical move with her. But I just remember that one evening where we were talking about general stuff and suddenly I said to her "Your problem is not the lack of love but your problem is deep sexual frustration." Then I stopped talking. That's when she said, "I want to fuck you". I can tell that it was sudden and it surprised me completely. She did every move after that: physical, kissing, etc.

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    11. As per the commentare there any resources that would be recommend on how to create long-term attraction via non resource methods such as commitment, affection etc?

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    12. What you want is roughly the inverse of getting girls for short-term interactions without at least okay looks. Sorry to break it to you, but if you lack resources, your chances of entering and maintaining a long-term relationship will be severely limited. (Look up the therm 'hypergamy' for more on this issue.)

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  6. Hmm, a book that seems to vindicate or placate why it's ok for a woman to be single:

    http://www.npr.org/2016/03/01/468688887/single-by-choice-why-fewer-american-women-are-married-than-ever-before

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    1. Well, in terms of evolutionary biology certain terms have to be met in order for more or less stable monogamous pair bonding. One of those cobditiins is the need for male material resources. The other one is the actual restriction of female sexual chioce. If women have a massively increased array of possible males to choose from and are encouraged in being as choosey as possible, their most thorough choice processes will become effective and they can afford to remain "single" as long as they feel they're not meeting adequate male prospects. This is exacerbated through relative female financial freedom. Even though most women will never earn enough $$$ to remain completely financially independent from men, they van now earn enough to remain relatively independent in order to prolong phases if choice in their wait for a "good partner". In former times this was impossible and women HAD to choose and then marry. Since men and women are totally different, lead different kind of lives and have a different sexuality it is only logical that — given the current conditions of most Western societies — many more women will be single for lobger stretches of time and in their most valuable and fertile years. The dire consequences for most women have been succintly summed up in Aaron's classic piece "The biggest dating mistake women make"

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  7. This is a nice and short article that tells you if you exercise enough: http://www.nhs.uk/Livewell/fitness/Pages/physical-activity-guidelines-for-adults.aspx So, get your butt up and do something!

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  8. In Ontario, this passed:

    https://news.ontario.ca/opo/en/2015/10/ontario-strengthening-laws-to-stop-sexual-violence-and-harassment.html

    While I agree that sex crimes should be penalized, I do wonder about loose definitions of sexual violence (e.g. "gray rape", "wait, I consented but maybe I didn't since the dude broke up with me) can haunt guys later on.

    This point "Remove the limitation period for all civil proceedings based on sexual assault -- and, in certain cases, sexual misconduct or assault -- so that survivors can bring their civil claims forward whenever they choose to do so" seems ripe for abuse.

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  9. I guess, this is probably my "most important post", ever.

    OK, just to mention it: during the past weeks I've been reading massively up on the lastest scientific findings in evolutionary biology, both in English and German. I've always been sort of interested in this field of knowledge, but diving deeply into hardcore papers and books of this part of science (initiated purely by accident) is a real mind-opener.

    I can absolutely assure any man, who wishes "to really get this part of his life [i. e. with women] handled once and for all", to read up on the lastest findings on evolutionary biology (not evo-psychology!), already reading good and scientifically credible popular books on this matter will suffice in opening up your mind: about life, about this world and what it actually might be all about, about philosophy and about truths and falsehoods, about mammals, about that mammal of MAN, about men, about women and (of course) about sex. If you can wholeheartedly accept the truths which this cardinal branch of science will provide and confront you with, you will progress big time in life. It might be mindboggling for some, but it will also have the qualitites of an intitiation and it will make you GROW UP.

    So, after getting a solid and intuitive background of knowledge in evo-biology – which should be the FIRST step – subsequently, just buy one of the rather cheap books of Aaron's – and put his practical knowledge into action. With this bulletproof combination you will then have everything in your hands that you might ever need. Because everything that he writes and suggests to you is in total accordance with evolutionary biology. You will even understand all the hidden processes working in the background in male/female interaction all the better and will enable yourself to act in harmony WITH them and make them work for you, instead of AGAINST you and really be yourself in that process.

    Where all of this might ultimately take you, that is completely up to you.

    But, Darwin and his successors are truly among the greatest liberators of humankind. I've always somehow shared this sentiment, but NOW that I actually KNOW this to be true, I can even back this up scientifically in person. Which is great. ;)

    OK, that's been my rant for today – many greetings to y'all and to Aaron in particular! ;)

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    1. Any book or essay to get started with it?

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    2. I agree with anonymous. Can't you give a bit of a summary here?

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    3. On top off my head I'd recommend
      - Dawkins' THE SELFISH GENE
      - "Evolution: Making Sense of Life" by Zimmer & Emlen

      Should you happen to understand German, recommendations for an introductory read could be:
      - "Evolution – ein Lese-Lehrbuch" by Jan Zravy
      - "Warum Frauen doch nicht benachteiligt sind" by Matthias Rahrbach (self-published by a biologist, not a pamphlet; very thorough & cool at the same time)
      - "Evolutionsbiologie" by Ulrich Kutschera

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    4. Btw: I didn't recommend any recent, peer-reviewed papers & articles, 'cuz I'd thought that it would be rather inappropriate for an introductory read.

      But two highly illuminating text about somewhat recent findings in evo-genetics would be those

      - "Genetic Evidence for Unequal Effective Population Sizes of Human Females & Males" by Jason A. Wilder, Zahra Mobasher & Michael F. Hammer, 2004-12
      - "The genetic legacy of the Mongols", American Journal of Human Genetics #72: 717-721

      Otherwise, you might wanna check out the peer-reviewed periodicals like "Science", "Nature", the "Journal of Evolutionary Biology" and others…

      Delete
  10. Interesting stats:
    https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/all-about-sex/201602/the-shocking-truth-about-hook-ups-and-casual-sex

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    1. Glad to have you back, bro. :)

      That's one of the rare times I see 3% for 21+ partners, which seems about right. I have seen so many bullshit like 29% of men having 21+ partners, which is absolutely insane.

      3% is 1 man out of 30-35 having more than 20.
      30% is 1 man out of 3-3.5 having more than 20.

      My experience tells me that most guys are losers and there is no way that everytime I pass by 3-4 men in the street, one of them is a "pimp". Everytime I see 30 men and one of them is a "pimp" seems about right.

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    2. It unfortunately rhymes very well with evolutionary biology, that a substantial amount of male mammals just will NEVER EVER get sexual access to females, or even to sexually attractive females. Not even by force.

      With homo sapiens, this unfortunate male subgroup is called "absolute beginners", genetically, mentally ("love shyness", holding unrealistic romantic notions of love & sex, lack of positive aggression) and financially unattractive guys who even in their 30s or 40s have never had sex with a woman, never kissed a girl or ever successfully completed a satisfying date, etc. pp. Research on this subgroup is still somewhat scarce, but it is being estimated, that this subgroup amounts to a solid percentage of 10 - 15% of all males (maybe even more).

      For those men their situation is devastatingly painful and a demeaning itch. But on the other hand – nowadays – it might save them from a lot of ha$$le. Because, in many ways for the average "good guy" it can be quite a hassle, and a costly and time-consuming endeavour to find a girl he likes, woo her, get her into the sack and then entertain and keep her long-term and eventually NOT get screwed by divorce laws and man-hating radical feminism. I'd wager, that quite a substantial number of men in today's Western societies might hold the notion that going through all this hassle just for the sake of pussy and male sexual validation just isn't worth it any more and that having a girl on one's own life doesn't necessarily correlate with happiness in life any longer…

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    3. Depends on what you count as a partner as well. If you count just kissing as having a partner, it is easy to go up to 20. If you count actual fucking, less so.

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    4. But who counts kissing as a partner lol ?

      Never did that.

      Delete
  11. Any thoughts on this article posted on SquattinCassanova's blog regarding an obese gamer batting out of his 'league'?

    http://www.pickupalpha.com/obese-gamer-boogie2988-finds-love/

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    1. There is not much information in the post. He's fat. You only see her face from an angle, so it's impossible to say how hot she is. Further, he has two million subscribers on YouTube, which arguably generates a hefty income for him, and will most certainly make him attractive to some women, i.e. not very experienced, possibly easy to boss around and take his money. Note I'm not saying that this is the case. However, I'm just pointing out an obvious explanation of why he is certainly not batting out of his league, due to the simple equation 'money = chicks'.

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    2. The argument about the fat guy who gets girls is a reoccurring theme in most PUA's schtick, and is always apocryphal. Going from experience, the only fat guys I saw with attractive women were financially well off. You might find the odd outlier where a woman may find overweight guys attractive, but that would be an extremely rare occurrence.

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    3. It depends a lot on what kind of "fat" we're talking about, and what kind of "attraction".

      - Sometimes people say they know a fat guy who gets laid a ton, and what they mean is someone who's "borderline overweight"... In other words he barely qualifies as overweight. If he loses 3-5 kilos (5-8 pounds), he would get into the "normal weight" range.

      I do know guys like this who get a lot. Most of them are taller than average. (not all, but most are taller than average)

      - At other times, when dudes say they know a "fat guy" who gets da hotties, what they mean is that an overweight guy has been in a relationship with a few hotties... Remember that for women, in relationships a guy's looks matter less than in casual dating.

      So if he hits all the other switches in terms of being a good long-term provider, his being overweight won't be as much of an issue. So he loses 3 points on looks, but makes up for it by being above-average in other areas.

      But still, even in this scenario, we're talking guys in the "overweight" category, not actual obese guys. For an obese guy to have a series of hot girlfriends, he'd need way more than a "good personality", and probably fame, massive wealth, etc.

      - And then other times when dudes claim to know an obese guy who's "killer with the ladies"... what they mean is that they always see him with hot female friends... This is just inexperienced guys thinking he's banging these chicks. He's really just the fun teddybear free bodyguard that makes the girls laugh, so they hang out with him, take him everywhere, etc etc...

      - I don't know any "seriously fat" guys who get laid a lot with hot chicks. Like actually fat, as in guys that are in the actual obese category having **casual sex** with hotties. It just doesn't exist. Whenever you hear a claim to the contrary, it's someobody conflating one of the previous categories to create a phantom person.

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  12. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=crksZWhl4VE

    Is this happening in Germany?

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    1. That guy is talking out of his ass. The masses of illegal immigrants are of extremely low social status. We're talking about the absolute bottom of the economic food chain. Thus, women tend to not associate with them. If that guy was right, then we arguably wouldn't see so many instances of sexual harassment and rape (cf. https://twitter.com/xyeinzelfall), and instead women would flock to those "dominant alpha males".

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    2. I think there's a twofold perspective one could assume in judging this youtube video.

      A) Yes, this guy is talking B.S. and his stance is rather motivated by wishful thinking, since many of those gimmegrants of course are interested in "trading up" sexually and thus fucking non-African, non-muslim German chix, maybe even "getting elevated in status" by being able to get them into a RL etc. And here's the problem: as Aaron pointed out most of those men will never ever be at par economically with average middle-class German citizens – and THUS will not be able to assume the classic, genetically programmed role of male provider. Consequently, most women will NEVER ever voluntarily or without being forced enter into any real association with such alien males.

      B) But an influx of new fuckers WILL increase the genetic pool out of which women in Western European societies can go "genetic shopping" for whose "consequences" regular German man will have to pay. So some of the sexually attractive & aggressive migrant males (only the "better few") will most certainly be utilized by German women as providers of better genes for the successful propagation of their own genetic material by giving birth of "sexy sons".

      But such an influx of sexually aggressive males will also show those in many ways betaized domestic males, how "civilized" and "castrated" they have become. For them the overall outlook is rather humiliating.

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    3. How is it Germany these days? ...I heard about some regional elections:

      https://pjmedia.com/trending/2016/03/13/at-german-ballot-box-islamophile-merkel-gets-head-handed-to-her/

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    4. Well, at least the situation in downtown Berlin is getting steadily all the more troublesome. Here's a thoughtful written impression (albeit in German):

      http://www.rolandtichy.de/feuilleton/lebensstil/diesel-mit-benzin-betankt/

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    5. Well, in Canada it's honky dory as evidenced here:

      http://www.huffingtonpost.ca/2016/03/26/rob-green-syrian-refugee-elora-ontario_n_9549064.html

      Kumbaya!

      In other news, don't have raunchy sex with chicks lest you become a minor celeb, piss off said chicks and then they accuse you of rape 13 years later:

      http://www.huffingtonpost.ca/lydia-lovric/everyone-guilty-in-ghomeshi-trial_b_9543870.html

      Delete
  13. Mr. Sleazy congratulations on offering practical advice for meeting women. I've dabbled in the pua bs and it's a total waste of time. I was a shy guy taken in by their theoretical abstractions. I discovered your blog and saved myself valuable amounts of time and money. It took me a long time to figure out that meeting girls isn't rocket science. But if someone does seek advice it's good to avoid assholes who say chode or theories. Good looking loser was another good resource. I respect both of you guys for offering practical advice and unmasking the gnostic cult of pua.

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    1. You are very welcome! If you have a spare minute or two, then please consider leaving a review on Amazon as well. It would be greatly appreciated.

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    2. I definitely will sir. That's another thing on my to do list. To make a long story short by applying your advice from your blog it has helped me to rebuild my social life and get some action. I'd join your forum for some more knowledge if it's possible. Thanks again

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    3. That's great to hear! My forum is free to join, so just go ahead and register an account.

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    4. @anon: Congrats, dude!
      If you really wish to see through things even more closely, read up for a solid knowledge on evolutionary biology at some point of your journey. I really cannot stress this strongly enough. Everything you're gonna experience & encounter, everything Sleazy and Novy say & write will just make so much more sense to you, you won't regret it. It does make that much of a difference. (just my 5 ct.)

      GLL has its drawbacks. I'd recommend not reading too much of his stuff, occasionally he cannot abstain from overcomplicating and burying you under his drivel. Yes, girls are evolutionary programmed to select guys with big(ger) dicks as sex-partners if need be. But if you're the one to step though a window of opportunity opening up right next to you while some particularly-huge-cock-bloke just doesn't, then your sausage will suffice just as fine...

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    5. GLL is too "positive"/"optimistic" too. When you read his articles, you get the impression that we live in lala-land and girls are not going to try to manipulate you.

      Sometimes he also says too caricatural things that seem like he is promoting another kind of game (I mean instead of saying "do some DHV and the girl will jump your bone" he says "be a douchebag and the girl will jump your bone" or "follow my retention guide and 100% of the girls you fuck will become your fuck buddies") which kind of annoy me. He also pretends that if you can get a girl on the phone, then it means she will fuck you (and texts are for pussies). Well, I remember very clearly my PUA days and that was exactly what these weirdos were telling me.

      Also, I don't like his videos that are only a proof that he is sexually aggressive and nothing else. He wants to make people believe that just because he was able to bring a girl to his car (and eventually home), he fucked her. Well, first of all if you do daygame you already know that 99% of the girls have absolutely no time to come home with you right now and also if you successfully pulled some girls home, you know that it is absolutely not the case that all of them want to fuck you. I also had instant makeouts in the street and never heard of the girl again. I eventually stopped doing daygame because it was such a waste of time and focused on method that were actually getting me a good ROI. But if you go on GLL (forum), there is a cult about daygame and if you get girls outside of daygame, people mock you and say "it doesn't count, bro !"

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    6. Don't get too caught up with GLL. You'll get all insecure about penis size. Also, he was caught using actresses in his videos so just view them as entertainment more than anything.

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    7. Gll offers some good office on some things obviously. But yeah the goofy stuff on dong size and druggy crap I don't read any of that s%^* topics relating to exercising and weight loss getting over shyness etc I can relate too. Day game is a mixed bag of either opportunity or failure, just like night time. Whenever nerds discuss dating techniques it sounds like a political discussion. But anytime someone offers some bs advocacy for a quote "theory" I start laughing. I like dealing with facts and results. The RSD guys and others run pyramid schemes and invent homo language such as chode. Everything is a theory blah blah. Anyone can be manipulated by a theory. Point being I don't agree with anybody 100% on this topic. However I think Sleazy offers practical advice for anyone to get a good start who needs help.

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  14. UCLA paper showing that confidence, arrogance and dominance plays a supporting role for men in the flirting process during certain phases in a woman's cycle?

    http://www.sscnet.ucla.edu/comm/haselton/unify_uploads/files/gangestad%20and%20haselton%20current%20opinion%20published.pdf

    The importance of behavioral features?

    Whereas preference shifts of major interest early on
    concerned male physical features (e.g., facial masculinity;
    scent), several recent studies have focused on women’s
    reactions to men’s behavior and dispositions. Previous
    research had found that women find male confidence,

    even a degree of arrogance, more sexually appealing
    during the fertile phase (e.g., [15,16]). Recent studies
    replicate and extend that work, finding not only that
    fertile-phase women are more sexually attracted to ‘sexy
    cad’ or behaviorally masculine men (relative to ‘good dad’
    or less masculine men), but also that, during the fertile
    phase, women are more likely to flirt or engage with such
    men [17
    ,18].

    Females of a variety of species, including primates [2],
    prefer dominant or high ranking males during the fertile
    phase of their cycles.

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    1. This is nothing new. The evolutionary concept behind this preference in selection by females is the "sexy son hypothesis", by the way. Merely reading such a study isn't really enough. It's even better to know, why such choices constitute a tangible evolutionary advantage.
      Furthermore it also must be mentioned, that some females are prone to avoiding such men even during their fertile phase. The specific biological conflicts expressing themselves in such kind of behaviour are also very interesting...

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    2. Thanks for the response Lucretius! I will look up the "sexy son hypothesis" out of curiosity. I figured that this post might be of interest to others because my impression from this blog is that nothing else matters other than working on Looks, Money, Status as long as you are normal, and not have aspergers and not say something stupid that f's it up. I do agree that LMS are the most important factors moreso than other things but I do suspect that having certain types of personalities or behaviors (other than just escalating and responding to IOI's) can increase your success (not to the PUA extreme of having a short obese guy date Supermodels of course with no Money or Status and soley his personality)with most but obviously not all women. I read Minimal Game and from my perspective in terms of personality/charisma development all it mentioned was to go to a therapist for "inner game" issues, confidence is something that is attributed to you by others for taking actions, and get out there and talk to more people. I do remember however that some researchers such as Steven Pinker believe that personalities are fixed so maybe there is not much that can be done to improve. Any thoughts on this subject will be appreciated.

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    3. Personalities are mostly fixed by around age 6 or 7, but you can sandpaper around the margins a fair bit over time, if you consciously work on it. A good portion of modern cognitive behavioural therapy is based on making people aware of certain counterproductive behaviours and then altering them. It does work.

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    4. Maybe I am not a scientist, but I have empirical experience and it tells me that people have a fixed personality around 20-21. Something tells me that it is the reason why in the "ancient" times, age of majority was precisely around 20-21.

      A lot of people do a 180 in their personality after their teenage years.

      And behavior is not personality. For example, despite all my experience with girls, I am still a romantic/sentimentalist (personality) but I don't show it anymore (behavior). Also you can be very arrogant in the inside (personality) but decide not to show it (behavior). Etc. You can change behavior, not personality. I didn't decide to be how I am or to like what I like. But I found the key to happiness is precisely to have a behavior in harmony with your personality and to eliminate all behavior that is contradicting your personality. (And that's why I'm not happy when I cannot be romantic.)

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  15. Krauser now lives at home with his parents and is unemployed according to his latest video. And people believe this guy gets laid? He claims hot, young women at that.

    http://krauserpua.com/2016/03/20/product-update-my-players-journey/

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    1. I strangely kinda liked his laid-back vibe. He sounds much better than in his other videos where he is trying too much to be a tough alpha/cool guy and is so caricatural.

      Hope someday he will understand he is much more attractive when he doesn't try to look cool.

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  16. I have a special request, Aaron.

    Can you give some advice on how to find a girl to get married ?

    I am at 40+ lays and I lost all hope. There is not a single woman on this earth I would trust after seeing what I saw.

    Well, if I only listened to my heart I would have married 4 of these girls. But I'm glad I didn't listen to it ! Because it was a disaster in the end. I honestly thought I would share the rest of my life with them, but no...

    So, some women I don't trust them enough to make them my girlfriends and then I cannot even trust my girlfriends to make them my wife.

    I tend to see again 50% of the girls I fuck. But then 10 more % are just a very quick fling, so in the end I get 40% of the girls (that I fuck) that want to be my girlfriends. Not bad actually. But then you have to screen for personal compatibility and behavior and omg...

    First of all, no way I'm marrying a dominant woman ; for a shag, ok, for a relationship, no way. Then, no way I'm having a relationship with a girl that cheated on her boyfriend. Then, no way I'm having a relationship with a girl that doesn't want to have sex every time we meet. Then, no way I'm having a relationship with a girl that wants to pressure me into a marriage (or kids or whatever). Then, no way I'm having a relationship with a girl that is a (former) slut. Then, no way I'm having a relationship with a girl that acts like a child. Etc. You get my point.

    I don't want to be a player all my life, I don't want to go to the prostitutes and I don't want to marry an unreliable woman. So, how did you manage to find a wife ?

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    1. Answering your question in general would fill a book. Taking your personal situation into account and giving advice tailored to your personal situation is something I do in consultation sessions, but not online for free.

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    2. I am in a similar situation man! I think I (and you/others in this situation) need to come to terms with the fact that the partner that is there to fulfill all my needs doesn't exist and that goes the other way around too. If I look at other's long term relationships, it often is a deliberate choice of two people to make it work because they value a such a relationship; i.e., it is a lifetime goal that they both want to pursue with effort. But it is by no ways easy or perfect. In fact, I know of little long term relationships that I would want to be part of myself. I also think it requires an amount of conformity that is less likely to be found in people visiting boards such as these.

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    3. The problem is that society has changed too much. In fact, women are incentivized to divorce you. In some countries the incentive are less, in others they are absolutely massive. As a consequence, the odds are simply stacked against you. So, in the end, you are entering a gamble with a partner that neither does not fulfill all your needs --- you don't fulfill all her needs either ---, not feels the moral obligation to stick with you. I agree with your statement regarding having a common goal. Without it, entering a relationship is doomed to fail. However, even if both are on the same page when entering a relationship, there is absolutely no guarantee that the same will still be true in a few years.

      Also, the Red Pill "alpha male" b.s. won't be of any help. No matter how "alpha" you are, she normally has access to a pool of similar men, and there will be someone who, for instance, looks better and has more money. The same is true in the converse: you most likely have access to women who are younger. In the end, guys leaving their "starter wife" and women divorcing their husbands are simply different sides of the same coin. (However, keep in mind that divorce/breakups are, in the vast majority, initiated by women, which refers back to my statement regarding societal incentives.)

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    4. Aaron speaks the truth.
      Having had quite a number of bratty sexual sperm-exchange encounters and now having retreated to a rather monk-like existence of meditation, classical martial arts & learning I occasionally ponder about the same issue.
      Unfortunately, there is no alternative to traditional, old-fashioned monogamy for a stable and wealthy society: it keeps males' sex drive and female hypergamy in check while providing most men with a woman, allowing them to direct their life energies towards other, more worthwhile purposes.
      The current customs in Western societies go still against this, because — as Aaron correctly points out — women, as gatekeepers to heterosexual sex, are openly encouraged to go out for genetic shopping, monopolizing men and thereby massively improving their Darwinian fitness to a point where this is now clearly damaging the stability & survival of entire European nations. Aaron assumes that feminism is clearly part of the self-destruction of the West — and I do share that view.
      However, there are clear countermovements to observe, e. g. take "Generation identitaire" in France & Belgium or similar movements in other countries.

      I'd wager that certain liberties men have granted to women in good will are prone to getting revoked, ultimately due to raison d'├ętat, to save state & communities. E. g. take Donald Trump's recent take on banning abortion and similar stances from the conservative side of the European spectrum.

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    5. Well, other anonymous, I was not even talking about a girl that will fulfill all my needs because I already know that such a perfect relationship doesn't exist. All I'm asking is loyalty/trustworthiness/reliableness. If you cannot rely on someone, then you cannot make any long-term plan.

      And since I saw what I saw, I cannot trust any woman. I became very good at identifying patterns and I know when I identify one, it is only a matter of time before the girl will do some nasty shit being my back or just simply lose interest.

      I don't want to marry a woman and then 3 years later, just because she is bored and selfish she takes half of my stuff and maybe also ruin our child's life. Also all the administrative bullshit you have to do is a hassle. And of course, I'm not even talking about the psychological pain of suddenly losing your family.

      So I was very curious how Aaron, that is a very skilled player and has a ton of life experience, did manage to find someone he could trust.

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  17. Outside from their marketing material, in real life most PUAs don't seem all that impressive. Anecdotally, a lot of the hot young women they claim to bang probably aren't that hot in reality, either. In university, the guy who had the highest lay count also lived by the saying that there were no ugly women, just not enough beer......

    In Krauser's case, if he is unemployed and lives with his parents, it would take an awful lot of "game" to overcome that reality. All things being equal, a guy with money and his own place would likely get laid more often than the same guy with no money who lives with his parents, and I am not sure what "game" would change this.

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    1. Krauser is:
      -40 (or so)
      -unemployed
      -living with his parents
      -unattractive
      -short

      Every hot girl I've ever known wouldn't have anything to do with the guy. In fact, most of them would outright pity him. Quite a lot of game indeed.

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  18. Diito the "I have a special request, Aaron." guy.

    What do you think Aaron?

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  19. Is this true?

    bit.ly/1pEmlEh

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    1. Yes, this is true. That article even links to sources.

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    2. Yes, sad but true and sobering to some, I'd hope. I've heard about this as well from friends living in the Hannover area in Lower-Saxony. It's not been conjured up at all.

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  20. As addendum to this (albeit in German, from German PBS):

    German come artists apparently have produced a 16page illustrated manual for muslim migrants on how to "integrate" themselves into German and European culture:

    http://www.tagesschau.de/deutschlandkunde-fuer-fluechtlinge-101.html

    From what can be gathered through this video it becomes clear just how substantial the cultural differences are – and how absurd the measures are to somehow mitigate and cover this up.

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