Monday, February 23, 2015

"Dude, you better get married soon. You're getting older."

Mitchel left an interesting comment on my post “An Anecdote on Female Intere$t":

Although I am very open to marriage to in the next 2ish to 3 years, I'm in no rush. I'm not letting myself go, and my value is not dropping any time soon.

How right he is! Indeed, I’ve noticed that the shaming language that is used to tell me that they should “man up” and marry seems as if it is targeted at women. No, guys, your sexual market value is not dropping off a cliff in your thirties. With just a little bit of foresight, your 30s will be the time were your life will literally take off --- this is certainly something I witness among my single friends in their 30s with solid careers who have all their bases covered.

However, lack of experience then makes some guys who haven’t much dealt with women end up with a potentially bad deal. Surely quite a few of you know cases were some poor guy, about to get somewhere in life, ended up with literally the first girl who wanted him. To tell one of the more unpalatable anecdotes: I once took an evening course on literature at university, and one fine day one of my classmates just couldn’t contain her glee at having gotten her hooks into an engineer who was about to graduate and, “yes, yes, he’s got a job offer, six figures, he’s talking about buying me a ring as well” — after they had known each other for something like two weeks. I think because women rarely viewed me as “relationship material” they sometimes tended to be fully open about their view on other men in their life. In fact, I’ve been in plenty of situations were a woman let me know that she was in a relationship, but hit on me anyway. The sub-communication was apparently along the lines of “don’t worry, I won’t pester you about a relationship because I got that part handled”.

This wasn’t as much of a digression at it might seem. Sadly it is a fact that far too many men settle too soon, being unaware of what kind of deal they are getting. Manosphere readers — I recently saw the term “manuresphere”, which I deem quite fitting — may be quick to mention the “cock carousel”, but that’s at best an exaggeration. The bigger problem is that those naive men may have notions of love and devotion, not realising that they are part of an economic transaction. The women they are interacting with are fully aware of this. You may have heard stories of women using sex as a bargaining chip. Does this sound like something a woman who doesn’t view a relationship in economic terms would do?

What do you think? Let me know in the comments below!
(Also, if you’ve got a comment that is off-topic or only tangentially related to this article, then please post in the most recent Open Thread. Thank you.)


  1. BLACK pill the reserves lol, so there are man to steal value from later
    when female needs a permanent meal ticket?
    and thats why they tell you to work hard and make a good living and get married,
    its a scam to arrange a group of guys to be used for gold digging by females and other
    fuck it. better stay old and single then married and life sucked out of you.

    1. Well... people who are married tend to live longer. So, no idea why you think a marriage sucks out your life in the long term.

      And did you just call all our moms a parasite? Even your own. Them be fighting words, you wastrel!

    2. You might want to brush up on statistics, and also note that Western society has changed dramatically over the last two to three decades. While not 'all women' are bad, quite a few make poor marriage prospects. Not everybody's mother was a saint either. I've certainly spoken to my share of estranged young men who didn't want to have anything to do with their mothers (this seems a resentment not uncommon among men who were raised by single mothers).

      The alleged connection between having a longer life and being married would deserve some further scrutiny. Off the top of my head, I'd say it's bullshit that has attained the status of popular truth due to constant repetition in the media, just like the "one in four" rape statistics. If one was indeed able to show that married men live longer, I'd be very interested in the population of that study. Should such a link be found, I suspect it has to do with wealthier men not only being more desired partners for marriage, but also having access to better healthcare or a healthier lifestyle.

    3. Aaron, with this comment of yours on single mothers and the resentment by their sons you are 2000% right – I had to gasp in shock for a moment when I read this, because I hadn't expected to read this at all on this blog. It is so unfailingly true and of course, this notion goes entirely against the dishonest meme of uncritical praise of mothers, too. It may be disturbing for some, but IT IS TRUE, TRUE, TRUE.

      Thanks again.

      Best, M.

    4. Quite often I wonder whether some of the people who comment on my blog, questioning me or others, have any real life experience at all (Ever hypnotized a woman into bed? Ever seen a hot woman with a short, poor, ugly guy? Okay, so why the fuck do those morons defend "game"?). To me it seems it's next to impossible not to see through all the shams and lies. When something contradicts my experience, then the last thing I'd do is discounting the lessons life taught me.

      I have something to say about the depiction of motherhood as well, but I shouldn't make too many promises because I've got enough on my plate already. There's a fun article coming up which you'll surely enjoy, though.

    5. Oh, I'd surely love to read that upcoming piece of yours. Keep 'em coming! ;)

      On a serious note, it seems the idolization of mothers (and in turn the devaluation of fatherhood, i.e. the role the father must play in the psychological triangulation of father - mother - child) has been a big problem of current Western societies for many decades. In Germany, where I reside, there exist of course the remnants of the National-Socialist "cult of the mother", which are STILL effecting the collective subconcious. You know, those ideas, that mothers always have a hard life, that they are constantly sacrificing themselves for the common good, that they can do no wrong, that they shouldn't be questioned and if they do something wrong, then it's not actually their personal fault, but the "circumstances" or whatever. That all their wishes and desires should be fulfilled and that it is the duty of the children to be good and obedient and to make mummy happy.

      Esther Vilar has written extensively of how women – since they give birth to children and since it is them, on whom children in their first formative years solely depend on for their survival – can and do indoctrinate especially boys in a way, that would secure later on an overall complacent behaviour towards women, which the female collective could easily continue to exploit forever.

      Also the great psychoanalyst Erich Neumann (C G. Jung's most important pupil) wrote very informative books & essays on the problem of the female and of the psychological processes connected to it ("Die Angst vor dem Weiblichen" and "DIe psychologischen Stadien der weiblichen Entwicklung" just to name a few).

      Growing up and maturing seems to demand of a child to step out of the trance-state within the overarching female psychological uterus, and to recognize the parents for what they really are: just human beings, not infallible and not immortal, certainly loveable – but mostly flawed. Just like oneself. And that's ok. But this process does not take place all by itself, it has to be initiated from the outside. The power of this process and of its implications has been captured in myth and through the arts for ages. If women remain within the psychological symbiousis of their mothers, then it's not that bad, since they can still function as a female. But the man has to say "no" and to draw a line, in doing so he has to "hurt" his mother in order to break free towards "the light" – strong metaphors, I know. But if a man is unable to break free from that clutch of the maternal female through a catalizing outward masculine impulse, then it ends as a catastrohpe equal to mental castration for the young male psyche (to which physical castration might follows up as well). Tough stuff indeed! ;)

    6. i was raised by a single mother i cant say she sucked value out of my dad but, a i have anxiety issues with bullying and some social phobia from school days however, when i see how my mom constantly search for social approval and try to
      arrange good image and all the cover ups she dig up on auto pilot i start to wonder id this behaviour on her part when i was younger was where i was forced with dysfunctional behavior.

      i remember she threatend me that every one would laugh if i tell something to others, or to shut it in a social setting , now i realized it was threats and scam
      to alter my behaviour because she was just followin g her female social approval biology.
      so it wasnt even my fault yet those anxiety issues still come after me to this day, by the way i love my mom since she at the same time helps very much, except for this fucked up detail.

  2. Nice article, Aaron. But let's analyze this a bit more formal. I recently stumbled up on a great essay by Gould: "The median isn't the message". I would like to proceed in the spirit of this essay, meaning, your mind and your heart have to be one to have the right outlook on life. Now, let's have a look at the facts:
    - The average life expectancy for males is 80.1 years in Germany and 75.35 for the US (
    - 55% of heterosexual males have two to 20 sexual partners in their lifetime (
    - Males get their true skeletal maturity in their 30's and early 40's (
    - On average for men pay stops growing at age 48 and is typical around 95k dollar a year (
    So, if you are in your 20's you most likely have some pretty awesome years ahead if you work on your fundamentals. This is good news and should take some preassure off. :)

    1. Those are interesting links. I'm not sold on the numbers for sexual partners. The Wikipedia article furthermore states, "A nonscientific survey conducted in 2007 by condom-maker Durex measured promiscuity by a total number of sexual partners. The survey found Austrian men had the highest number of sex partners of males globally with 29.3 sexual partners on average. " This must be rather non-scientific, because and average (!) of 30 is ludicrous. Maybe they were including gay men, or guys like Johnny Sinns and Terry Richardson.

    2. I am glad I didn't get married too early. I bumped into a guy I went to high school last summer and he looks depressed. He has like 4 chins, his wife is a blimp, and he looks like he hasn't got laid in years.

      I wish I could find the article, but according to a study I read, men are actually their most attractive at age 34 I believe was the age. Even though I'll be 30 this summer, women in their early 20's still refer to me as "hot".

      I can really appreciate the beauty in younger women more as I get older. Why wouldn't a guy take a woman that is younger woman than one WELL past her prime?

      I was talking to a couple PUA's last summer and the funny thing is, not only was I told I was "awful" and on a low skill level "game" wise, I was also told once I turned 30 I won't be able to run "good looking guy game" any more. I would stop making fun of "game" because then I will need it lol. I'll be 30 in June and no damn way am I putting on the cape and pulling out the wand. Like Aaron said before, "game" is mostly about preparation. "What's up?", a bit of small talk, and then grabbing a number is more than enough "game" if you take care of yourself. According to the PUA's, I don't "create any attraction" (they were obviously referring to verbal attraction, dorky jokes and teases) in my interactions. It was very funny.

    3. I also think the number is a bit high. I suspect that the underlying distribution in the range of 2 to 20 sexual partners is skewed to the left side and thus peaks probably around 7 to 9 sexual partners. But it should convey the general message, nontheless.

  3. Marriage for men has always been slavery. Society shamed men into providing for and protecting women and her children. In days past, a man that didn't have a wife had difficulty finding employment and one that didn't provide for a woman's children was deemed defective. Men were also sent to war to fight and die for their rights - rights that were given to women without any cost. Men that didn't go to war were branded cowards - by both men and women. These things are still somewhat true today, but more and more, men are standing up to this misandry and male disposability. Marriage, for all intensive purposes, has always been about the exchange of sex by women for provision and protection by men. To a large extent, society still enforces these roles.

    In the past 40+ years, tens upon tens of millions of men have been destroyed through marriage. As a result, hundreds upon hundreds of thousands of those men have committed suicide. This is the real reason for the decline in marriage.

    Feminism inadvertently freed men from their traditional male roles. Now, men aren't forced to provide for and protect women. As more and more women enter the military - fewer and fewer men's lives will have to be sacrificed for women's rights. Women cast off their traditional roles and now men have done the same.

    Because of the above, we are moving toward a more equal society in which one gender isn't forced to sacrifice themselves for the other. To continue this trend, white knights and chivalrous men must be removed from the male ranks. These are the men that will gladly throw other men under the bus to gain favor with the gynocracy. These men are relics of dark days past (for men) and need to be called out and removed from any gender equalized society.

    1. Woooow I see it's quite easy to get from "guys don't get married because of your low self-esteem" to "Marriage for men has always been slavery." and "In the past 40+ years, tens upon tens of millions of men have been destroyed through marriage. As a result, hundreds upon hundreds of thousands of those men have committed suicide. This is the real reason for the decline in marriage." which starts to get really ridiculous.


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