Sunday, November 17, 2013

Reader Comment on Male Sex Drive during Middle Age

I received an interesting email from a reader (thanks, K.!) regarding my last article Male Sex Drive from Teenage Years to the Middle Age, and thought I better share it with you:

maybe I'm an anomaly, but I'm just about as horny as I was as a teenager, and don't need little blue pills to get horny, hard or stay hard! Maybe a little motivation for those guys heading into their 30's and 40's, as I'm 59! I attribute it to not smoking, eating healthily as in organic whenever possible, staying away from red meat and keeping in shape at 5'9" and 175 lbs with a flat stomach. Partly genetics maybe, because I have longivity in my family tree on both sides.

I've met some guys in their late 40s and 50s who were in phenomenal shape. No, I didn't ask them how often they had sex, but I think they perform better in the bedroom than all those downtrodden 30-somethings you see everywhere.

What do you think? Let me know in the comments below!


  1. Mid-40ies here. No drop in horniness, big drop in putting up with female BS though.

    1. Turning 45 this month. Yes drop in horniness since there is a (major) thing called "Sex Transmutation". I no longer pursue women, nor I consider them worth my time and energy. I have way better things to do. And that, my firends, is a great feeling. Sex is so overrated, self-control is what really makes a man powerful.

  2. Early 50s here. I agree with your commenters who point out that horniness is related more to health than to age. Also, Aaron, your earlier post about time and leisure affecting libido is also correct.

    I am in decent, but not superb shape. I recently went through period of inactivity with predictable results, and am back on track. Aging calls for increased discipline in many ways. But, frankly, not that much discipline -- just moderation, common sense and regular exercise. I feel good -- not much different than I did in my early 30s.

    Overall, my level of desire has to do with sleep as much as anything. That wasn't so much the case in my late teens and early 20s. Also, I don't pop as often as I did -- this is the stereotypical thing you'll hear about. As a young guy, you tend to orgasm faster, but more often. My normal deal back in the day was twice in the evening with a new/exciting partner and at least once the morning after. Maybe more sometimes, maybe less.

    On the other hand, as an older man, I have much better stamina. Partly, I attribute that to practicing yoga with the mula bandha, or, basically, Kegels. But to be honest, it takes me longer to recover after an orgasm. That's about the only difference, though.

    Well, that, and I don't get random boners the way I did in high school.

    I tend to wonder about the influence of Internet porn, too. I went through a period where I used it pretty often, and I think it tends to burn out your sex drive -- but perhaps that was an issue of age? Anyway, I've pretty much sworn off the porno (maybe once every six weeks or so, with some much longer gaps). That keeps things fresh and interesting, and, I'd say, kind of on a normal level. Watching a ton of porn made me a bit jaded. I have to believe that if you're in your 30s or 40s, working a demanding job and using porn to blow off stress and some accumulated steam, that it would probably damage your motivation to get out and get with a real female.

    As for female BS -- yeah, much quicker to spot it, much less willing to put up with it. And that also could be a symptom of a somewhat reduced libido. Or wisdom. You're call.


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