Sunday, March 8, 2015

The alleged Double Standard of Height (Men) vs Weight (Women)

Cani recently alerted me to a thread on Reddit, leading to a rather amusing picture showing an exchange between a guy and a girl. The girl bluntly asks the guy how tall he is. Since he’s 6’3” everything is great — but when he asks her about her weight, she gets all defensive and petulantly poses the question why this would even matter:

Now, as some of you might be able to confirm, height is basically fixed. Yes, I know, you’re a little bit taller in the morning, and once you’re in your 70s or 80s, you can expect to shrink. But for practical purposes a tall guy is a tall guy is a tall guy. In short — no pun intended — if a woman marries a tall guy, that guy will remain tall. There is zero risk that he’ll be a foot or two shorter one year after.

However, guys are not always so lucky. If you end up going out with a slim girl, and take her as a girlfriend, it may very well happen that she gets complacent and packs on some weight. It’s incredible how quickly women can fatten up once they stop giving a fuck about their sexual market value, as any person who has ever spent any time in a public can confirm.

I’d say there is no controversy — outside moronic PUA circles of course — that height in men is a universally attractive feature, just as being slim is ceteris paribus a very attractive feature in girls, and they are very aware of it. Did anyone of you ever hang out with some girl who was into you, and who felt the need to stress how slim she is — “I weigh only 45 kilos!” she may blurt out, completely without context, or randomly remark that you could probably easily lift her with one arm (which is also a nice subtle compliment).

But isn’t it funny how the accepted social narrative once again bashes men? Note that you’re shallow if you prefer a slim woman on your side. All she needs to do is putting the fucking fork down, for Christ’s sake! On the other hand, as a short guy a lot of women don’t even give you the time of day, and you’re supposed to be fine with it. Apparently it’s not a double standard if it’s bad for men.

What do you think? Let me know in the comments below!
(Also, if you’ve got a comment that is off-topic or only tangentially related to this article, then please post in the most recent Open Thread. Thank you.)


  1. It doesn't just stop with weight. Imagine the shit fit a girl would have for a guy if she found out he wore shoe lifts. Never mind, it's accepted and normal for a girl to wear high heels, hair extensions, make up, push up bras, etc...

    From my experience and for being such a huge criteria for selection, girls cannot accurately judge height in person. A guy can claim 2 inches higher than he really is and most girls wouldn't know the difference because she probably thinks she is 2 inches taller than she really is.

  2. I think a man's height is similar to breast size. I met a girl off of POF once, and the first thing she said to me was - "nice, your actually 6 feet tall".

    Later on she told me she would never date a guy under 6 feet. Now this girl was around 5'2" or so and obviously very shallow. But I have several male friends that won't date a women with small breasts, so I think it all evens out.

    1. so if i am 5 9 which i am, that means i can have chicks with bellow average breasts?
      sucks but i dont mind too much about it, what about the size of her ass compared to her body? is it dick with men? if so i am fucked in here too. lol.

    2. I don't think its a good analogy because:

      - All women prefer taller guys, taller is better (always) for a woman
      - Breast Size is not a universally preferred thing for men
      (or ass size)

      I don't think there's a female equivalent that's this universal and this powerful in terms of conferring benefits.

    3. "All women prefer taller guys, taller is better (always) for a woman"

      Unless you're way above 7 feet. Than you're a freak of nature or a highly skilled and paid basketball star.

    4. Apparently, the taller a guy is, the bigger his dick will be. I mean literally. Generally speaking only though.

    5. Well males height matters to me im 6ft 2 but dnt knw why a 5ft grl wld haue to worry about a guy being tall enough

  3. Women also discriminate weight in men

    1. And dick size
      And income
      And looks
      And hairstyle

      Never ends.

  4. I believe the distaste for short men goes a lot further than simply not giving them the time of day. See this twitter:

    Women literally seethe with contempt for short men. It was jaw dropping how some would actually wish death on these men for something that is completely out of there control (to a certain extent). Really puts a hamper on women being the most "empathetic" gender.

    1. so women are crazy as always and complain they arfent attracted to many men,
      oh well i am not wishing death to women i am not attracted i am not even thinking about it.

      THEY ARE crazy
      its like short men-> no attraction?-> no entitlment to satisify(look my bf is tall, or
      like i am not wet for you , you have nothing and i cant get nothing u are usless die, so it will be easier to find taller ones,because there is less short.)

      so women bash men who they wont and cant get anything from, i guess its their entitlment calling to extract resources at all costs. parasitically of course.

  5. Honestly I can't say I blame them. I dislike the same style of fixable and permanent features in certain women that they hate in certain men. I don't like tall women. I like bright eyes. I don't like deep voices. I don't like huge floppy vaginas. I don't like straight hair on women. I rarely find anyone over 120 lbs attractive. I don't like virgins. I think she has a right to ask the guy his height since they're obviously meeting online and he hasn't displayed the information. His reply was pretty scornful in retrospect. She asked him about a feature that arouses her, and she might as well have asked him how big his dick is. The guy could have maybe taken a few lessons from Minimal Game, calmed the fuck down, learned when to shut the fuck up, and gotten laid instead of trying to be a shining internet white knight.

    Anyway, the picture has been a great topic for internet discussion for awhile now. I never get to see a devil's advocate.

    1. Agreed, men and women are free to have their preferences. If some girl only wants to date 6'3+ then so be it. She is not only girl on the planet and there aren't many 6'3+ men anyways. If you are short then just move on and look for a different girl.

      However, issue here is that social narrative bashes men for being too shallow if they ask a girl for her weight. Of course if the girl asks a man for his height then no one sees a problem with that.

    2. "calmed the fuck down, learned when to shut the fuck up"

      So, I've heard that the military trained you into being one tough, obedient pussy hound.

      Few men are desperate enough for harpooning land whales.

    3. I guarantee you the whale in the personals ad that Aaron posted in the previous thread has found more than a few desperate men. Thar she blows.

    4. Topher, the problem at hand isn't about wheter or not she finds a male that meets her lludicrous high standards for her market position, as it is with Nigerian scammers, you will always find some poor souls that you can trick to do what you want. This ensures the law of large numbers.

      The real problem, though, is about her lacking self-monitoring which was pointed out by the guy who she talked to over the internet. Furthermore, it isn't the case that she isn't aware of the fact that her question might be conceived as slightly blunt and inappropriate. It would have been fine if she would have had answered the question about her weight, but she refused to do so, because she felt it was somehow inappropriate. Therefore, we can conclude that she's lacking a full functioning self-monitoring or to speak simply, she posses a silly double standard.

      So, one could, of course, just let that one slight and focus on banging her brains out and if this is all you wanna do, I think it is fine. But this girl is most likely after a relationship (!). So, you will most likely end up getting this kind of shit on a daily basis if you happen to end up with her in a relationship. As Aaron pointed out in another post on this blog, you better stop this kind of bullshit right from the beginning. Moreover, notice her complete lack to reconsider the whole situation and put thing into perspective. Again, it would be all fine if she just asked him how tall she is if she just wanted to get fucked by a guy she fancies. But then in return it should have been equally fine to answer the question about her weigt. Furthermore, the guy in question actually answered (!) her question.

    5. Modern women are like communism:
      -They want everything
      -They give almost nothing
      -And they say that they do that for our good (!)

      And men are like capitalism:
      -Women and men like sex
      -Women gave us affection and their pussies
      -We gave them money and our dicks
      -We trade affection and money, and sex

    6. Of course there is no problem in her asking. Of course she should have her preferences. There is absolutely nothing wrong in her asking and the guy in the post did not get one tiny bit offended at her asking.

      The point is he is also allowed to ask about his preferences and when he did so SHE got offended.

      He got annoyed by the double standard.

      But apparently he needs to calm the fuck down and take what women dish out (anything less than pleasing women wouldn't be 'manly') and apparently not caring more about sex than showing up a double standard is being a white knight. Or something.

  6. Anonymous,

    I think Topher is right in the sense that yes she shouldn't have asked that but at the same time he shouldn't be trying to take the high-ground here to prove a double standards point - that's how some women are - end of story. "Insert Topher's last sentence."

    1. Why shouldn't he be taking the high-ground? He asked a legitimate question, and she responded by evading it and pretending it's not relevant. And she'd respond the same way if he asked what her boob size was.

      Women love judging men, hate getting judged by them. That's a habit that needs to be knocked out of them, because it's not helpful in life, and only wrecks civilization when society refuses to clamp down on that shit.

    2. I agree with Germaine. Why shouldn't he? It's an absurd fact that women may judge men on height (something they cannot control) and are able to ask a man how tall he is, and then remain above reproach if they judge him based on height?

      I am not saying women should be attracted to short men, but if a girl is allowed to ask a boy about something she finds sexually appealing, shouldn't the boy be able to do the same?

      "That's how some women are" is not a legitimate excuse for a double-standard. In response to what Topher said, why should this guy NOT be an "internet white knight"? He was angry about men being judged for something they cannot control, and being unable to judge women for something that they, in general, can control. If his goal was publicity, he did a damn good job.

  7. I remember a guy at work once told me to take a look at the ankles when thinking of marriage haha. He says the ankles don't lie.

    It is a double standard though. I work at a hospital, and I guy I used to work told me a staff member would often pinch his ass and say, "You have a cute butt". Imagine me doing that to a cute nurse....insta fired!

  8. You're so focused on men's physical characteristics that you don't see that there are other things that can influence a girl's decision to sleep with you.

    Keep in mind what Voltaire, the french philosopher, said, "Give me 10 minutes to talk away my ugly face and I'll bed the Queen of France"

    1. Voltaire was a celebrity, and belonged to the upper echelons of society. I'm not familiar with his sex life, but I have little doubt that he easy access to women, no matter whether he made use of it or not. He would have gotten laid without saying much at all. In fact, given that this statement is by Voltaire makes it lose all the power you imagine it has.

    2. If I remember it correctly, Zan Perrion used this quote in some of his material, to convince people that "being a good seducer" was more about the mindset, than about looks (citing Voltaire or Jean Paul Sartre as premier examples…)
      So much for somewhat uneducated people lecturing the gullible…

    3. The modern day equivalent would be Donald Trump saying that money doesn't matter :p.

      When it comes to alleged "ugly men", they always have another quality to make up for that. I know one guy, who's very ugly, but he's a great guitar player in a band and can play the most amazing guitar solo's. Guns and roses solo's are no challenge for this guy, I've seen quite a lot of women drool over him.

      Life really makes more sense if you look at it from this perspective.

    4. @Marco_Polo

      I think Zan knew what was up with these guys, he was just manipulating his customers.

    5. Voltaire, I believe, was also an alleged homosexual so this quote means even LESS than what Aaron pointed out. And the fact that there are other things that influence a girl's decision makes me even angrier--many women will sleep with or marry a seriously ugly guy that has a ton of money. I see it all the time, but this is not seen as "shallow" in our society. A man, on the other hand, marrying a woman because of her wealth would be seen as ridiculous.

  9. "However, guys are not always so lucky. If you end up going out with a slim girl, and take her as a girlfriend, it may very well happen that she gets complacent and packs on some weight. It’s incredible how quickly women can fatten up once they stop giving a fuck about their sexual market value, as any person who has ever spent any time in a public can confirm."

    Remindes me of this:

    By the way, I like this verb 'to fatten up'! LOL :D


  10. I am also skeptical of the possibility that you can create attraction without having the looks to back it up but I was wondering if similar to the above comments about Voltaire being rich and high status do you guys know what the truth might be to the story of the real person that the 2000 movie The Tao of Steve was based on (Duncan North) who was supposedly overweight and not rich seemed to be successful with women based on his 'system'?

    1. It's a movie. That's all you need to know...

  11. I'm not saying that it is definitely true but according to the article I provided his system worked for the guy in real life but that could also just be a way of promoting the movie.

    1. There is no indication he can pull decent looking women. His system? Lower your standards.

  12. This blog made me think of my early 20’s, as I was rejected by the foxes who chased after the Alfa males and showed no more interest in me than glancing at a blade of grass next to the highway traveling at 75 MPH. And this made me think about my own personal experiences with tall women, a slightly different story from this blog, but same result due to being a Beta male.

    One 6’ tall girl, in a gym, talked to me with such a look of disinterested she couldn’t have looked or acted more uninterested if she had wanted to. I approached another, who I estimated being 5 foot 9 or 10 inches. She got angry with me for even asking her out and stuck her finger in my face informing me she didn’t date shorter men. On line, I met a girl 5’11”, and we worked out together once in my apartment complex gym, after that she did not return my two phone calls, there could be others, too, I just don’t remember them all. Now, you may say the rejections were because of my looks, that could be true, but as I approached girls closer to my height, my success rate went way up.

    This blog also made me think about the rejections by tall girls, and it angered me, but not at the time the rejection. Only years later, when I actually tallied them up, did I get angry. I was rejected not because I was fat, bald, ugly, deformed or had a rotten personality. No. The reason I was rejected by all of these women was my height. Not a one even bothered to put forth the effort to get to know me much less date me. (I did date one girl for 3 years when I was in college, who was 5’8”.)

    I did date three women who were significantly taller than me, two at 5’11” and one at 5’10”. (I am 5’8”) And all three happened to be 32 years of age, which is more than a coincidence and a tie in with this blog. No doubt, all three wanted a tall Alfa male, and lost, so a safe stable Beta male was the next best thing in their 30’s, for I certainly didn’t grow any taller and I doubt I got better looking. These women were past their prime and worried. I was in my late 30’s, at this time of my life, after being married for 10 years. It was also at this time, I could easily date younger women, and I did. When I was 38, my first girlfriend was 27, the next was 27 and the next was 24 who became my second wife. I never dated with any intent of marrying a woman my age. Younger women had no issue with me dating them, and I certainly had no issue dating them. I remember going to singles events and seeing very pretty women, who were my age, who I know 15 years earlier wouldn’t have given me the time of day. And even now, may have looked better than myself, but now it was me who had no interest in approaching them. I did not want to take time and money away from pursuing younger women. Why go old, when I could go young?
    I am now married and have 4 sons. I have 3 degrees, and I have co-authored 2 US patents. I could have provided a good life to any girl. I wanted a taller girl because of the physical turn on and to for fill one of my desires, yet not one single tall girl (in her 20’s) gave me a chance. I was turned down consistently and without a second thought. SO, IF YOU FIND YOURSELF IN YOUR LATE 20’S OR EARLY 30’S WITH NO PROSPECT OF A HUSBAND OR CHILDREN, YOU HAVE NO ONE TO BLAME BUT YOURSELF. There were men like me, who wanted a leggy female, but they, like me, were never accorded the opportunity. (This also applies to average height women, too) And the reality is that the vast majority of tall women will not even consider a shorter man until it is too late. You would think it would be obvious that if you included shorter males in your suitor selection, your odds would increase of finding a mate, for there are a lot more short and medium height males than there are taller ones. So my advice would be to accept the advances of all men and get to know them.


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